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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: March 2012

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

People will behave exactly how you expect them to if you never allow them the chance to show you otherwise.

People will never rise higher than you allow them to with your treatment of them.

If you never allow someone to feel confident, they will always disappoint you in their abilities.

If you never give someone the chance to show you that they can do it, then you will always be proven right that they can't.

Everyone needs to understand that if you make a judgement on someone and never allow that judgement to change, the person you are judging will never change in your eyes.  No matter what they do.

Think about how you treat people and then think if that might be why your expectations are always met, for better or worse.  Maybe it's not them that needs to work harder to change.  

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Hold me to it!!!! I beg of you!!!!

Well, last year my friend did the Tough Mudder.  Ever heard of it?  It's a marathon like obstacle course that is 10 miles long designed by the British military to kick your butt and see what you're made of.  Oh, and the money from it (nation wide) goes to the Wounded Warrior Project.  :)

I had said that some day I would do this course... This was added to my someday list that includes running the city 5k that is for charity in my town, running a marathon, and various other things that I tend to forget are on my list when life happens.  Well, going to Europe was on that some day list and I did that didn't I!!!?  :)  So, I've decided, that since I will be celebrating the third anniversary of my 26th birthday this year, there are some things I should accomplish this year before the fourth anniversary comes up.

Yes, all you lovely people out there reading this who will have considerably longer memories than I do-  I will be doing the Seattle area tough mudder this Sept.  :)  My friend who did it last year will be doing it with me.  I've decided that paying the registration fee will help keep me to it too.  But so will all of you, right?  :)

I've enlisted the hubs to do it with me and we will train together.  And, because the course is 10 miles and our little city, summer run is only 5k, I'm thinking I can do both this year.  The 5k will be a good test  of where I'm at and, since I'll be training anyway, shouldn't be a stretch.

Since we've been home, I'm still sick.  Yes, this is the first day of week three of this crud and week two of my antibiotics with not much improvement.  That said, I'm understandably grumpy and the hubs hasn't been taking the sickness well and has gone back to ignoring me a bit.  I'm sorta getting irritated.  So, I'm hoping that me feeling better soon (fingers crossed) and the time we can spend running and training together will help.  The pups are almost old enough to run with us too.

So, in July I will be running my very first, official 5k and in Sept I will be subjecting myself to the Tough Mudder.  :)  We might even have a team we can join of some Marines the hubs knows who does it.  That would be pretty sweet!

Hold me to it!!!  Ok?  This is happening!  :)

Monday, March 19, 2012

Deep Breath, I love my parents, I love my parents....

Ok, so y'all know things have been hard with my mom.  For some reason she doesn't feel the need to call, see us, or in anyway be apart of our life.

Well, just day prior to our leaving for Europe, I got an email from my cousin about my uncle.  He was discussing the fact that my uncle was thinking about turning off his dialysis and was ready to die.  UHM?  WHAT?

My mother did not think it was important to tell me that he was sick, in the hospital and dying.  Apparently, my whole family got together and planned a day to all go visit and say their goodbyes.  I did not get to do that because I was not told about it.  She then told me that it would be find for us to leave because he wasn't going to die yet because he planned to stay on the dialysis for a week or so.  He turned it off a day later and died a couple days after we arrived in Europe.  I never even got to see him to say goodbye or tell him how much I LOVED our talks.  And I was not informed about him turning off his dialysis until he was already dead.  She forwarded all of those emails at the same time on the same day, a few days after he died.

I was heartbroken.

When I expressed my frustration about not being kept in the loop (during the conversation I had with her prior to our leaving) this is what she had to say:  "Well, he was showing signs of illness at Thanksgiving... Oh, but you didn't come to that."  And, "We all talked about it at Christmas too... Oh, but you weren't there.  We tend to discuss this stuff at the family gatherings, but you haven't been to any in a few years."

Ok, so, if you are all following her logic, my having gone to school for two years to get a job, and said job requiring that I work holidays and weekends, means that, because I am unable to get time off of work to attend various family gatherings, I no longer need to be told when my family members are sick and/or dying.

My cousin on my mothers side has been posting about a sick uncle.... I assumed it was her uncle on her dads side.  Then she said my mothers brother's name.   No one has bothered to tell me he was sick.

Nice, right?

The whole family is assuming my parents are keeping me in the loop, and my parents don't seem to think that they need to tell me about anything.

I'm chanting "I love my parents" in my head over and over to keep from screaming. 

Thursday, March 15, 2012

My Fundamental, Fatal Flaw

We all have an FFF about us, don't we?

Here's what I have learned about myself and what mine is:

Ready for some cold hard truth?  I over do it.  I lack the ability to suffer through down time.  I am fundamentally unable to enjoy doing nothing.  That's the truth.  Sounds stupid, doesn't?  It doesn't sound like that big of a deal, really... Well, it is.   I'm ashamed to admit how often people tell me to "relax," to "just do nothing."

So, for the last how many months now, I've planned a trip to Europe.  I've stressed to find a balance between working full time, continuing my obligations as a wife and housewife (a role I never gave up, in spite of going back to work full time), as a dog mother, all the while trying to plan a trip to Europe.  I sat on the plane to London and looked at my husband and said, "What on earth am I going to do with all of my free time now?"  Seriously, I said that.  For 6 months I've planned, detailed, and listed every move I would make, not just for 14 days in Europe, by day by day, week by week.  I do this, the list making thing, to make sure no detail is forgotten.  I'm thorough.  I have back up plans for my back up plans.  This is just good sense when you are juggling as many roles as I am.  Wife, animal saver, doggy mother, house keeper, accountant, maid, personal assistant, best friend... These (and sooooo many more) are the balls I have to keep in the air at any given time.  And everyone is quick to let me know when I have let them down, so I NEVER let anyone down.

So, we flew over the big ocean.  We laughed away 14 days.  We flew home.  I arrived stateside sick with a horrible sinus infection and a terrible cough, yet I woke up Sunday morning and powered through unpacking as much as possible while my husband slept in.  Then, I went to the doctor and slept for two days straight.  I powered through my first 14 hours shift back to work, while sick, and and now sitting on my couch and realizing my FFF.

Before Europe, I was just as busy.  Right now, I'm realizing, after 14 days away from home:  I don't watch TV, even though I have Tivo.  I'm already caught up on all of my shows and I've hardly watch any TV today.  I haven't done much of anything today because I'm on call tonight and I don't want to be too sick to go in should they need me...

But here's what I used to do pre Europe planning...
I extreme couponed, I took the dogs to dog training every Thursday, I cleaned the house every week, I paid bills, I did dishes, I cooked my work meals every week, I organized, I kept appointments for our whole life, I was there for my friends, I made plans for saving money and/or getting out of debt, I filed, I ran errands... I could keep going, but I would bore you.  Keep in mind that, aside from filing, I did this stuff every week.  Was there anything wrong with that?  No.  Was I doing too much?  Yes, because I did all of this while working 40+ hours a week.

This has been a horrible realization.  Is it ok to do nothing?  Absolutely.  Am I sitting on my couch struggling not to do more?  HELL YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  UGH!

So, new plan for life:  It's ok to not do so much.  I'm going to start working out again.  I'm going to do my crafts, which combos down time doing fun stuff, but also save us money because I'm sewing some gifts and such.  I'm going to cook and clean, but be sure I have time to watch TV, read a good book, take a bubble bath, or do more crafts just because.  I can not let my FFF get the best of me.  I can not keep filling my life with a lack of down time and then feel overwhelmed when anything in my routine changes, like planning a vacation, because I'm already doing too much.

Do you think it defeats the purpose of my new life plan if I make a weekly schedule to allow for all of my stuff and my down time?  LOL!  See, it's going to be a hard change to make. :)

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

We're home

Europe was awesome... Mostly. So, my anniversary, the actual day, was, well, it was what my husband does when it counts. Need I elaborate?

But over all the trip was great, except for the tiny part about my catching a cold halfway through. We touched down in the US saturday night and I've been up graded to sinus infection and on deaths door by my doctor. I return to work tomorrow, so fingers crossed the meds finish kicking in and I can survive my 14 hour shift.

When I'm feeling a bit better, I'll post some pics!

I'll admit, after 14 days galavanting around Europe, I wasn't really ready to come home,
Let alone go back to work or reality :) but I also started to miss the brats towards the end, though the little one didn't seem to miss us at all! Lol!

So, it's back to reality for me... Well, assuming I can kick this sickness. :)