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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: My Thoughts On Infidelity

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

My Thoughts On Infidelity

In light of recent events, I’m sure you all know what I am talking about, I’m going to do something I rarely do.  I’m going to tell you exactly what I think, and I am not going to sugar coat it.

Infidelity can happen for a number of reasons.  The man who would never dream of cheating can grow weary and unhappy in his marriage and begin finding emotional solace in the arms of another woman.  The woman who has always stood strong can begin to feel unwanted and unloved and seek appreciation in the arms of another man.  But make no mistake about this: Cheating is never acceptable. 

Whether you have become too emotionally close to another person, or are actually sleeping with them.  Whether your spouse is ignoring you, or you have fallen out of love with them.  I don’t care.  I don’t care if your job is stressful, your husband is never home, or any other reason you may tell yourself justifies your actions. You are wrong. 

When you marry someone, you are pledging to stay with them, love them, and be faithful through good times and bad.  This is not a pledge that is only good during the good times.  You are not telling them that you will only stay faithful when you are both on the same page in life.  This is a pledge, a vow, to be faithful no matter what.

It is irresponsible to think that when you are entering a marriage things will be perfect for the next 80 years.  You will grow apart, you will grow together, you will fight, that is life.  If you are like me, your husband may deploy for a year and come home unrecognizable as the man you married.  You may have to spend years trying to find something to bring you back together.  But you know what?  That’s what you do.  It’s been three years and I NEVER once strayed from my marriage.  We grew apart, we led different lives for an entire year.  That is still not a valid reason to break my vows.  And if you are telling yourself that it is, then you should not be married.

I’m not saying there are not reasons that you may want to cheat.  I’m not saying that I don’t understand them even.  What I am telling you, is leader of the CIA, or housewife, it is your duty to your spouse to tell them how you feel.  If you just walk away, into the arms of another person, how do you expect your marriage to ever improve?  The troubles in your marriage are not going to be magically fixed by having sex with another person and when your life suffers for your choice to do so, you will have no one to blame but yourself.

Being unfaithful damages so much more than your ego when caught.  So the next time you want to feel sorry for an adulterer, consider the family, the children, and the spouse who were sitting at home and blind sided one day with the fact that their spouse betrayed them.  Think about how easily that could have been avoided had that person come to their spouse instead of hopping in bed with someone else.

No marriage is perfect.  There is no magical answer that fixes a marriage in trouble, but sleeping with people outside of your marriage, is definitely not going to solve anything. 


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2 Comments:

Blogger Jen said...

I 110% agree with this post. It is sad that people would throw away their marriage for another person. I know first hand how that feels my ex-husband cheated on me continuously and when he finally got caught it was over. It hurts more than just the couple it hurts everyone around you as well. So sad.

November 14, 2012 at 9:14 AM  
Blogger Marcella{The Life of a Military Family} said...

Amen! SO well said!

November 14, 2012 at 3:41 PM  

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