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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: Don't They Like Me?

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Don't They Like Me?

I've been blogging for a while now and I've noticed a trend in my stats and followers.  Between my FB page, this here blog, Twitter and all of those other ways people can follow my posts, I have a fair amount of regular readers.  But every now and then I log on and have lost some readers somewhere.  Sometimes I losr readers here, Twitter followers and FB likes all in one day.

What's funny is that I took it very personally for a long time.  I was sad when I lost readers.  I wondered what I could have posted that might have made them keep reading.  Was my FB page boring? Was I not on Twitter enough (it's an off and on kind of love) or am I just not a good blogger?

You know what? That's ridiculous.

This past month I've been purging my life.  I can't even count how many FB pages I've liked for a contest or because it seemed interesting at the time only to discover they just weren't my style.  I've followed blogged to discover that I didn't have time to read all of those blogs and I had to stop following the ones I skim the most.  Or because the content wasn't interesting to me.  I've unfollowed people on Twitter for the same reasons.

It's hard as a blogger to not take it personally.  We are sharing our heart and soul with a group of strangers.  We are sharing personal feelings and information about ourselves, so it's very hard to not take it personally when people stop wanting to read what we write.  And, frankly, it is personal when we lose readers.  They are saying I didn't like what you were writing.  Kind of like when someone breaks up with you and says "it's not you, it's me." What they are really saying is, "it's not you, it's me.  I stopped liking you."

But it's also really not personal in a way.  They aren't saying I'm a bad person.  They aren't saying I'm a terrible writer.  They aren't say I suck.  (At least not to my face) In this world of FB, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and all the other things we have to follow, read, post to, connect with people and fill our time, we can only "consume" so many things at ones.

I have gone through and stopped liking FB pages, blogs, Twitter accounts and the rest.  And I didn't do it because I hate the person.  It's not you, it's them. And it's not a personal slight against you.

It was a strange lesson to learn, but a good one none the less.  I will keep writing what I do, I will keep being me and those who like what I have to say will read it and those who have other interests won't and it won't matter either way. Sometimes I wish I could ask them why, but you know what? I unfriend people all the time.  I walk away from blogs and I never give an explanation.  Maybe they were just purging their lives of all the miscellaneous stuff that fills their feeds like I tend to do.  And that's ok.

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6 Comments:

Blogger Jen said...

I had to do the same thing. I would take it so personally and get really upset. I hope you are having an amazing day friend!

November 3, 2012 at 9:08 AM  
Blogger Allie said...

It is hard not to take personally. I never joined twitter and my blogs Facebook page isn't very popular. I try to look at it logically but sometimes you can't help but wonder!

November 3, 2012 at 10:41 AM  
Blogger Holly said...

What I like about your blog is that you actually post real stuff! You don't ONLY link up or just post a bunch of pictures of yourself, like so many other blogs. You actually write and there is content!

November 3, 2012 at 11:57 AM  
Blogger ____j said...

It took me a while not to take it personally, too. But you are so right. It takes so much time to keep up with all of the social media AND be a 'good' blogger. At some point you just have to figure out what works for you.

November 3, 2012 at 7:14 PM  
Blogger Marcella{The Life of a Military Family} said...

I have to constantly tell myself it isn't personal....but it's oh so hard!

November 3, 2012 at 10:22 PM  
OpenID raisingahappyfamily-momof8 said...

I am hearing you on this...it is strange for me too, because when I write a controversial post I get many many views but always lose followers..then I am torn between writing for me or writing for someone else...I decided to write for me....
anyway, i am your newest follower..pls follow back if you can.

November 5, 2012 at 6:21 PM  

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