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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: A Girl Everlasting

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

A Girl Everlasting

Sometimes I feel like I lose motivation half way through the day.  It's all going to be there waiting for me tomorrow anyway, right?

It reminds me of the book Tuck Everlasting.  I haven't read the book since I was a kid, but one part that has always stuck with me is the idea that when you have forever to clean, why bother.  I don't have forever, but do I really want to spend all of my time picking up the same mess each day?  Welcome to wifehood, but sometimes I want to tear my hair out.

Every day is the same.  I wake up, I check my email, I take the dogs for a walk, I feed them breakfast and do the dishes while they eat.  I pick up the kitchen, do some laundry (yes, I really do that much laundry) I pick up the living room, I pick up the husbands laundry that he has left all over the house, I pick up the shoes in the entry way, I pick up the bathroom, I wipe stuff, I tidy, I check my email 100 more times (why I get 100 emails a day I will never understand since most of them I just delete), I might (and it's a BIG might) watch some TV.  I check my FB here and there, sometimes more often, sometimes less.  I train the dogs a bit, and do busy work that never seems to end.  All day, every day.  I don't see people, they are all at work while I'm home and I work while they are home.  And then on certain days, I deep clean.

After the flood and four straight days of clean up and sorting etc, today and yesterday I lost steam half way through my day.  It probably doesn't help that I had 5 loads of military laundry to do, which I find incredibly tedious.  Normal laundry I don't mind, but for some reason cammies and such drive me nuts to fold and put away.  And that was on top of our normal 3-5 loads of laundry.  Since neither the hubs or I can where civies to work, we have way more laundry to do than just two people should.

But I'm looking at my house, knowing that it's cleaner and tidier than any of our friends.  Knowing that having four days off a week allows me to clean.  But I look around and know that the list is never ending.  My iPad has a terrible and awesome app that allows me to maintain a variety of lists and tick stuff off as I go and continually add to it.  I have long term and short term things to do and home improvement stuff and the likes... But it also never ends.  And I never seem to have time for anything on the lists because of all the general tidy/cleaning I do each day... It's a never ending battle against the clean home and the messy gnomes who leave crap laying around for me to pick up.

I feel like, if I have the never ending mess and never ending job to do as a wife, does it really matter if I do it all today?  His military clothes will be in a pile in my hall again soon enough, the dishes will be in the sink after dinner again, the mess will creep up in the middle of the night for me to see in the light of day, whether I do anything today or not...

When it feels like the mess will be there forever, why bother to clean it up?

Am I alone in this feeling?  

2 Comments:

Blogger Cassidy said...

You're far from alone. I just recently quit my job due to an upcoming PCS and having to focus entirely on personal affairs, although my schedule hardly changes.

I get up, do yoga, take the dog for a walk or go to the gym, go tan, come home, pick up the house including spot cleaning, dusting, deep cleaning or sorting out what's trash in each room and what's not to help clear out clutter from the move. Shower, figure out what's for dinner, play with the dogs, maybe watch some TV, check FB, check my email, pintrest here and there, rinse and repeat. It's never ending.

April 17, 2012 at 1:46 PM  
Blogger chambanachik said...

I feel that way many, many days.

April 18, 2012 at 2:39 PM  

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