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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: So, this is 2012?

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

So, this is 2012?

A few days into the New Year and I'm already feeling that this year isn't going to be all that much better than last.

Sigh.

We paid to have our carpets cleaned, stain treated, enzyme treated, and a stain resister put on and the dogs still insist on marking.  I still have these terrible migraines, and I'm still waiting for insurance approval on the treatment.  Things keep going crazy financially, so Europe is looking less and less perfect, and more and more like a trip on the fly with nothing but wandering the streets because we won't have any money.  My best friend is so heart broken over a breakup a few months ago, that she is no longer returning anyones calls.  :(  This includes me.  :(  I'm trying to not take it personally, I swear.  And I still feel like I don't have anyone to turn to.

Sorry to be a debbie downer, but I'm just feeling like all my hopes for a good year are being dashed.

My lovely bloggy friend Erika over at Chambanachik  had a blog the other day about being tired of wishing for more and realizing that wanting something badly, and working hard, isn't all it takes to make your dreams come true.  I'm with her on that one.

At this rate, I'm never going to get to go back to school and finish my degree.  I'm never going to be/feel close to a family that doesn't want me (more on that in a minute) no matter how hard I try, and I'm never going to feel like I have someone I can count on....

As far as the family thing goes, let me recount Christmas for you:

The husband told me he felt too sick to see my family in the AM.... I worked until 4am so didn't plan on going, but woke up early.  However, he was NOT too sick to hangout with his friend, nor to go out to dinner with him and have multiple beers, then come home and play video games all night.  I spent all Christmas day cleaning the house because my hubs didn't pick up a damn thing on Christmas Eve, even though I was at work.  And when I called my family, who were all together, many of whom had flown in from out of town last minute to be there, I had only spoken to two people when my uncle (who is not on my good side as it is for being a bit of a poop to me in regards to hubs military service) said, "Oh, it's nice to hear from you, hope you have a great Christmas, but it looks like Grandpa wants to say grace, so we'd better go."  And hung up.  Nice, right?  I haven't seen or talked to most of them since I graduated 18 months ago, but why waste time saying hi to me on Christmas.  Whatever.  The fact that the hubs played video games all night, effectively ignoring me, was just icing on the shit cake that was my holiday.  Sorry about the language.

So, just not feeling awesome about the new year, or the hopes of it being great... I guess only time will tell.  And I suppose being in a cruddy mood today isn't really helping me have a positive outlook on life in general... 

3 Comments:

Blogger chambanachik said...

As you well know, I've been feeling the same discouragement. Just people telling me to get my hopes up (for the new year, etc.) makes it harder to, sometimes. I really hope we both get a break this year. And as always, I'm here if you need to vent.

January 3, 2012 at 9:43 PM  
Blogger The Social Frog said...

Have you gotten a single ONE of me emails? If so you have not responded back to me. I can not imagine my husband EVER being like that, especially on Christmas, how depressing for sure. Of course he is avoiding your family and he got to do what he wanted, while you were alone...SUCKS. I just can not fathom the disrespect he has for you and your marriage. I was hoping this year would be a good new start for you. Hugs.


www.thesocialfrog.com

January 3, 2012 at 11:34 PM  
Blogger MrsMcDancer said...

I'm sorry things are kind of poopy right now :-( Hang in there!!! Things are bound to get better *hugs*

January 5, 2012 at 10:00 PM  

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