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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: December 2011

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

It's almost a new year

I know, I've been MIA.  Sorry.

It's a few days from the start of a new year and here's the skinny on where I've been.  The truth.

Though it's true I've been in a funk lately, the truth is, I started a new job and over extended myself.

The truth is, I got horribly sick and was bed ridden for an entire week.

The truth is, I haven't been feeling awesome about my blog anymore.  Nor, FB, nor people in general.


The truth is, my marriage fell apart.  We are currently in the process of trying to pick up the pieces and glue them back together.  


The truth is, I don't know how I feel about posting my life here anymore.  I haven't been feeling like it's a safe place anymore.  I haven't been feeling like it's what my blog is about anymore.

I started this blog to deal with a deployment.  To cope with military life.  To cope with all that complications that all of this life has when married to a Marine.  He's still a Marine, and I'm still married to him, and we still have complications in spades, but I've been feeling like this blog has turned into something else.  I don't know what that is.

I know that when everything crumbled, I didn't feel safe posting about it.  I didn't feel comfortable and I didn't know if I would find support here or not.  In the past, I haven't. I was lonely without the comfort I used to find in this community.  I was sad that I didn't feel I could turn to my blog and my bloggy friends anymore.  But it's been a long time since I have felt that way now.  Many of you have been people I've become close to.  Many of you are people who I email back and forth with in my private life.  I missed feeling close to everyone, but I've come to realize that laying your life out for the public to view has just as many downsides as upsides.  The downside being that there are unkind people in this world.  There are people who feel they can say anything they want to you.  I get that enough in the real world.  I don't want to feel judged about my private thoughts.  So, maybe my thoughts should just stay private now.

I don't know.  We will see where the next year takes us and where I end up. I'm not saying goodbye just yet.  I just have a lot to be dealing with and need to find a safe place to cope.  I'm still trying my best to keep up with what y'all have been up to, even though I haven't been commenting.

I hope you all have a wonderful start to 2012.  

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Update on the non-profit

So, I found out that this non-profit has a poor reputation.  :(

That is our mistake for 1. Not researching them, and 2.  Trusting only one source and not verifying.  :(

I found out that many people have poor experiences with them and have had similar situations to our happen to them.  :(  Very sad.  Good intentions, but not great about the implementation.

Since we did send them a smaller donation, I figured I should also tell y'all why:

We went back and forth, but decided our money was best given to an org that we know their reputation first hand.  So, I've decided to use our extra money, and my couponing abilities to get food and treats cheap and donate it to our local city and county shelters.  There is also a non-profit my friend speaks highly of that gives free medical care to pets that belong to people who are homeless.  I've contacted them and they would love for food donations as well.

I worked at a non-profit previously that was well intentioned, but had someone running it that didn't know what she was doing.  They ultimately closed and most people do not even know how wasted so much of their money was.  I do not want my donation to be mishandled due to poor management.  I want to feel confident that the money I am giving is truly making it's way to help these animals find homes.  $400 is no small amount of money in our lives, and it's too much money for us to be concerned that it's not getting used appropriately... :(

Sad that we had this experience.  :(  I hope this place can turn it around for the sake of all of the animals they are trying to help.  

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

I feel terrible...

Remember my adorable "temporary" pup?  Well, she's not temporary anymore.  I love her and she is a perfect fit in our home.  So, why do I feel terrible?

I adopted her from a non-profit rescue.  I have heard wonderful things about them.  They are very well known in our area.  We went to an adoption event in our town and fell in love.  We didn't question the suggested donation that was $400.  She is a young puppy and is wonderful and this place runs completely on volunteers, foster homes and donations.  I was happy to help them for such a wonderful pup.  We were told she was healthy, happy and that they had IN THEIR POSSESSION, her vet records.

That was a lie.  They did not, in fact, have her records at all.  The person who was supposed to be my point of contact at the org kept saying she was working on it.  She then went on vacation.  She did suffer a family emergency, but did not contact us to inform us she would be unreachable and to contact someone else.  Our emails just went unanswered for weeks.  WEEKS.  No response about her records, our check that we wrote that still was not deposited, nothing.

We were frustrated to say the least.  So, I emailed the head honcho and told her so.  She contacted another rep and that person was able to get the records same day.  This begs the question, "why was our rep not able to do the same?"  But we accepted it as a victory and moved on...

Until 11 days ago when I noticed it had been almost 2 months and our check STILL had not been deposited.  I contacted our new rep and inquired and was told that our old rep had stepped down and had ours and a number of other peoples checks with her, still undeposited.  So, we waited.

11 days later (today), the check still has not been deposited.  :(  I had to call and put a stop payment on it today.  It was very sad.  I then called the head honcho and explained that we had done that, that we are beyond frustrated and that I will send them a new check, but for a considerably smaller amount.  She understood.  She apologized.

I do not think this is always how they do business, but my faith in their organization is shot now.  It shouldn't be this hard to try to do the right thing.  It shouldn't be so stressful to adopt a rescue pup and give them money in donation for giving me the perfect dog to round out our family. But it was.

She cited that they run on donations.  I get that.  But here's the thing:  I worked at a non-profit and I have a family friend who runs one.  They live and breath by donations, but those donations come in the form of peoples faith in the organization.  They believe in what the people are doing and believe they are doing it well, so they give money based on their ability to give and their faith and belief in what these people are doing.  They give based on their experience.

I had a piss poor experience with these people and thus have no faith in their organization.  They are doing a good thing, and I sincerely hope that we are a one time thing and that they usually do a better job.  But I can't give them so much money based on hope that they run their organization well, when we have experience the contrary.

I feel terrible that is has come to this.  I feel like a bad person.  I want so badly to give them more money, but I am worried about giving money to an organization that seems to be run so poorly, when I can give money to ones that aren't.  :(

I suppose everyone is going to think I'm a jerk now.  :(