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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: How it changed EVERYTHING

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

How it changed EVERYTHING

Everyone is posting about where they were 10 years ago today.   FB is filled with these statements.

10 years ago, I was just a kid.  I was just a kid, dating a guy who was a jerk, not knowing what to do with my life, watching a second plane hit a building.  I didn't know what the Twin Towers were.  I had never even heard of them, but I knew by the way the news reporters talked about it, they were important.

I heard the rumor that another plane hit the pentagon.  I heard another plane went down in a field and they didn't know if it was related.  I heard that all the terrorist groups refused to take credit.  I watch the TV screen, I worried about my uncle in New York, I worried about a friend I knew was in the military somewhere on the east coast.  I knew the world had changed....

But 10 years ago, I was a dumb kid who didn't want to keep hearing about it.  I was a dumb kid who didn't understand that hearing about over and over, days on end, terrified me because the nation I once knew, wasn't as safe as I thought.

10 years ago, I had no idea that this one horrific event, that changed our nation, that changed the world, that I watch pass me by in slow motion, would be something that would shape the rest of my life.

I had no idea I would meet a Marine 5 years later, then marry him.  I had no idea that, while so many of my friends would only remember the events in New York on the the anniversary, I would think of them almost everyday for an entire year, wondering what life would be like, if my husband wasn't fighting the war that day started.

I remember where I was 10 years ago.  I remember the room, the people, what the TV looked like, who I called, when I had finally heard my uncle was ok.  I remember.  But I don't find that to be important.  What I find to be important are those who's whole lives have been shaped around that single day.  Those who have to spend their whole lives wondering "what if." What if it hadn't happened.  The first responders who have to live with what they saw and had to do for the rest of their lives... And the families who have to live the rest of their lives without the people who did make it out of the buildings.

10 years later, where I was seems so trivial compared to how my whole life is shaped around that single day.  How my whole life has been effected directly by it.  And there are so many who have had their lives effected so much more than I have.

It's hard to believe it's already been 10 years.  It's very strange to me to think back to what I was doing at 18 years old and how I had no concept of how that day would change my life forever.  I had no clue that what I was watching in an awe inspiring horror would ultimately change the course of my life.  I had no idea that 10 years later, it would be as fresh in my mind as it was the day after it happened because I think of it so often.

And all I can do, is sit here and wonder what my life would have been like if it hadn't happened at all... And all I can do is cry inside as my heart breaks for all of those people who lost everything in an instant. For all of those families who's worlds collapsed in an instant.  To all of our service men and women and their families who paid the ultimate price to fight the war that that day started.

My thoughts are with all of those who are still suffering.  My prayers go out to them.  And to all of those who's lives are still effected everyday by what happened today, 10 years ago.

I was just a kid, who didn't understand how one day could effect the whole course of my life... Let alone the whole course of history.  And 10 years later, I'm still struggling to understand.  10 years later, it's still amazing to me how one day changed everything.

1 Comments:

Blogger chambanachik said...

It's so weird to think about it as we did- with the mind of a teenager. Parts of it I could grasp right away, and other parts I don't think I'll ever grasp at all.

September 11, 2011 at 5:55 PM  

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