<data:blog.pageTitle/>

This Page

has moved to a new address:

http://www.aboyagirlandthemarinecorps.com

Sorry for the inconvenienceā€¦

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
<data:blog.pageTitle/>

This Page

has moved to a new address:

http://www.aboyagirlandthemarinecorps.com

Sorry for the inconvenienceā€¦

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: Be the bigger person...

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Be the bigger person...

I've had some interesting realizations while being sick... The most unusual one came the other day.

For those of you who have been reading my blog for a while, you may remember me getting all upset a few months ago when a friend of mine used a racial slur in a FB post.  Well, though I'm usually not easily offending in the least, for some reason I got very upset about this and told her so... On FB, publicly, in her comments.  We had a very unpleasant back and forth during which she fired back at me and said some very hurtful things...

Well, I have been bugged by this for months now.  I have known this girl since the third grade.  She is not a racist or mean person at all!  I don't know why I reacted so strongly, but I have been feeling horrible that I did it so publicly.  This week, I realized that my feelings guilt do me no good.  Being reminded of it, and haunted by it for months has done nothing.  So, I emailed her and apologized.  I explained that I was hurt by her, but that I didn't blame her for being hurtful and that I also didn't blame her if she didn't forgive me.  I just needed her to know that I was in the wrong.

I hadn't emailed her before because I was scared.  That is the truth.  I was scared that she wouldn't accept my apology.  I was scared that she would still be mad and tell me to shove it.  I was scared that she would say mean things to me, but, I realized that that doesn't matter.  She has a right to still be mad.  And just because she may not accept my apology, doesn't negate the fact that I owe her one.  Period.

I am happy to report that she accepted my apology.  She said she has been wanting to email me for ages to say exactly the same thing and that she is sorry that she lashed out at me.  The crazy thing is, I don't really feel like she needed to apologize because, by all accounts, I started it and it was my fault for publicly being a jerk to her.  But, I'm happy she did and I'm happy that we are mending our friendship.

So, I want to say, sometimes, you just need to swallow your pride and hurt feelings and accept responsibility.  I have realized that it doesn't matter if your apology is accepted, it doesn't matter if taking responsibility gets you out of or into trouble.  The point is, you need to do it.  I'm so glad that I decided to do this.  I'm even happier that it worked out for the best, but, you know what?  I would still be happy, even if she hadn't accepted my apology.  I was feeling guilty.  It was bugging me and I needed to email her for my own peace of mind.  It just so happens that I got the result I had hoped for.

1 Comments:

Blogger Krystal. said...

That's really great of you to be the bigger person & apologize. I TRY and do the same. But sometimes my stubbornness gets in the way. I'M SO STUBBORN. But I'm really trying hard to change my ways. (:

Glad you mended your friendship.

March 10, 2011 at 7:26 PM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home