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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: Why can't I let things go?

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Why can't I let things go?

Ok, so I took pups to the vet today for her annual physical and shots. She is a bit overweight. She was five pounds thirteen ounces, now she is six pounds. She's only overweight by a little bit. Maybe a few ounces to a half pound. She should be closer to five pounds.

I posted on my facebook that she was overweight and had gained more. I wrote that I was feeding her less and walking her more and nothing was working.

Someone commented. No big deal. But he said that I was, either, A) feeding her too little and thus her body was hanging onto the calories to survive or B) that I was walking her so much that her weight was muscle.

There are two thing wrong with that. Well there are more than two, but here's the deal. She's a six pound dog. She is barely eight inches tall. It would by physically impossible for her to gain enough muscle mass to make her overweight, unless I put her on steroids. She is just too small. Not to mention I have never heard of a healthy dog, that has a good amount of muscle being overweight... And I'm in the industry. It just doesn't happen. That's not how they judge if a dog is overweight. They base it on how the body feels, not how much it weights. It's called the rib test. They feel the ribs to test if there is too much fat over them.

Secondly, isn't it a bit rude and presumptuous to say that I'm starving my dog? Or is it just me?

I commented back that I was feeding her how much my vet said to and that he recommended walking her more. I also replied that MIn Pins get fat easily, which is all too true.

What I should have said, is that he didn't know what he was talking about and pointed out the things I just said. I should have told him to bite me. I should have mentioned that I'm in the vet industry and I know how to take care of my dog. That Min Pins get fat easily and that my dog is barely overweight. The fact is, the vet told me not to worry about it as long as she doesn't gain anymore weight. He said she was fine just the way she is.

But I can't let it go. I'm not into confrontation, especially not on a forum like Facebook or Myspace, so I couldn't tell the guy my thoughts on the subject. But now, I'm ruminating over it. I'm thinking of all the things I would have liked to type. All while I was cooking dinner I did this.

Pardon my french, but WTF? What he said wasn't that bad, just ill informed. But I can't let it go. I never can. Why am I like this? I hang onto things. I lie awake at night thinking of things I should have said to people. Or shouldn't have, for that matter. I think of things people have said to me that upset me or hurt my feelings. I do it while I'm cooking dinner or showering. I just can't let things go.

I don't hold grudges. I don't get angry at these people. But things like this will bother me for months to come. I don't know why. It will haunt me. It will bug me. I will be having a grand old time and it will creep up on me. I'll be trying to sleep and it will creep into my brain. Then, instead of sleeping, I will be laying there thinking of it.

I wish I could just move on. I wish I could just say, "well, that was stupid/sucked/hurtful/ridiculous" and move on. I wish I could just let things go. How do I do that? How do I just move on from it? I hate that I do stuff like this.

Usually, I talk to my husband about it and he makes me feel better. He helps me get past it, but he's not here. So, I'm stuck thinking of this over and over again. I will drive myself crazy with all the things I could have said, or shouldn't have said, or wish I had the courage to say. I will drive myself crazy thinking of what he said over and over.

I'm so ridiculous.

This sucks.

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