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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: OpSec

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Friday, August 14, 2009


For those of you who don't speak military, OpSec is short for Operational Security. It is the shroud of mystery that surrounds all military missions. For those few of us who are privy to that secret information, we are bound by OPSEC not to share it. No email, no blogging, no whispering it to your friends. Strictly, a need to know basis.

I am bound by such obligation. Yesterday I got some news, I can't tell you if it was good or bad. I can't allude to what it was. But it's life changing. I want so badly to blog about it. I want to share what I'm thinking, to know if my feelings are valid. I want to know if I'm crazy for thinking the way I do. I want to know who else has been through this.

The news is not so big that I can't tell some people. I can't give specifics, but I have been able to tell my parents a little bit. But they are not good for perspective. My mother is a die hard civilian in every sense of the word. I need to speak to a military wife. Unfortunately, I am fresh out of military wives at the moment.

I wish there was a handbook. Something to guide new Marine Corps wives in the ways of the life. Something that would help prepare us for every situation that unfolds and how to deal with it, both physically and emotionally. A little guidance would be nice right now.

That's the thing I hate about being a reservists wife. We are alone in the world. We are forgotten by most. We don't live on bases, surrounded by other wives going through the exact same thing. We don't have support groups or spouse clubs to join. Most of the active duty wives look at us as though we don't belong. We are not as good as they are because our husbands live in the civilian world part time.

Our men train, often for long periods of time. They fight war games and leave the country for training missions. My husband misses weddings and other important dates because of the military. He disappears without any contact for months at at time. I am bound by the same rules. I shop at the same commissary. My husband fights the same wars. He gains the same rank. But we are separate from active duty persons. We live in one place, unless my husband changes MOS's (that's military speak for his job). Even then, they will fly him out to his new base each month and fly him home. We don't actually have to move, if we don't want to.

We live in separate worlds. It's the same military, but on a parallel universe. So I often feel alone. The nearest wife to me is an hour and a half away. She might as well be in another state, and many of my fellow wives are. My husbands unit is made up of men from all over the country. We don't have the built in support that active duty wives have. Even the actual military forgets about us.

So, I have a huge thing happen and I have no one to talk to about it. I can't share it with everyone. I can't give details to anyone. I have a huge secret that is eating at me and no one to talk to.

I understand why OpSec is there. I know it keeps my husband safe. I wouldn't want details of him missions leaked so that anyone could come and hurt him and his unit. But it's times like these, when I hate it.

I can't wait until I can blog about it, but by then, it will be a moot point.

It's days like these when I hate being a part of the military. But I really shouldn't complain. Most of the time, I love it. Most of the time, things are good. Most of the time, I'm not bound by OpSec. :)


OpenID michellehankins said...

Sorry to hear about the frustation. I will pray that God gives you peace, understanding and disernment throught this situation. I will also pray that He would give you some to talk to about such matters. Stay strong, friend!

I enjoy your reading your post!
How are the Raimen noodles treating you?

August 15, 2009 at 7:40 AM  
Blogger Mandy said...

My husband was also a Marine Corps Reservist, and you're right, it is so frustrating not to have the same support. I hope you can work out this big thing by yourself. HAng in there!

August 15, 2009 at 8:01 AM  
Blogger Sara said...


* 3 Tbsp. olive oil
* 3 oz. pkg. Oriental-flavor ramen noodle soup mix
* 2 Tbsp. sesame seeds
* 1/4 cup sugar
* 1/4 cup white wine vinegar
* 1 Tbsp. vegetable oil
* 1/4 tsp. pepper
* 2 cups cut up cooked chicken
* 1/2/ cup roasted peanuts
* 4 green onions, sliced
* 1 lb. bag coleslaw mix

Heat 3 Tbsp. olive oil in large skillet over medium heat. Break noodles into bite-size pieces and add to oil in skillet along with seasoning packet. Cook and stir for 2 minutes. Add sesame seed and cook and stir about 2 minutes longer, until noodles and seeds are golden brown.

In a large bowl, combine sugar, vinegar, oil and pepper. Add chicken, peanuts, green onion, coleslaw mix, and browned noodle mixture; toss to combine. 4-6 servings

this is really good! I hope you enjoy it!

August 15, 2009 at 4:47 PM  
Blogger Shaina said...

Hi there...I found your page from 20sb and wanted to say hello. I definitely feel your frustration...my husband was active duty Army when we lived in DC. Then, he got out, we moved to Indiana, and he is starting grad school on Monday. But then, a few weeks ago...surprise! He got recalled to active duty for - surprise! - a deployment. I feel so alone out here...not by any base. There is NO military here, whereas in DC, we were basically surrounded by them all the time. This is my husband's first deployment, and I just have no idea what to expect and feel like I have no support, either. Thank goodness for blogging, right?

Whew, this turned out LONG. Sorry. The short version is: I feel you, girl.

August 15, 2009 at 6:22 PM  
Blogger Joann said...

I just stumbled across your blog and I'm not sure how!! But, I'm a Navy wife, and I totally get the frustration about deployments, having stuff that you can't wait to share! I'm right there with ya!!! :-)

August 15, 2009 at 9:10 PM  

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