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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: Inspired

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Inspired

Ok, So I started this post this afternoon, prior to the concert but didn't have time to finish it before leaving... Sorry, bear with me.



Ok, I know I should be putting on make-up and otherwise prettying myself for the Dane Cook concert tonight. I should be getting ready on the off chance that I meet Dane Cook and he finally realizes his love for me and proposes. I know I am a married woman, but my husband understands my deep connection with Dane Cook and will there for understand my need to at least sleep with him once. :)

The reality is, I've been reading blogs. This is my new favorite past time. I love the inside glimps into peoples lives that they offer. I get to know all about someone and who they are without ever meeting them face to face. But today I read a blog that I didn't really care for... A first for me. I'm fairly selective about who I read. I picked this blog for it's honesty. But today, I'm not so sure.

She was talking about women. All of our glory and all we have worked for and all our potential. She expressed her disdain for someone wanting to find a rich man to marry who will take care of her. Don't get me wrong, we should all be proud to be women and be thankful for all that we have now, but I am not a feminist.

I am an anti-feminist. Somewhere along the way, it became bad for a woman to want to marry and stay at home with her kids. Why do we all need high powered careers? Why do I need to work full time and make more than my husband? What is so bad about wanting him to take care of me?

I am a stay at home wife. I haven't worked in two years. I do not have children. I have a dog, but that hardly counts. I love cleaning the house and taking care of my husband. I love paying the bills and making him dinner. It is totally fulfilling to me. I knew when I first met him that my purpose in life was to take care of him. I don't want to work full time. I want to be a wife.

I do go to school. I am going to work eventually. I want to. But only part time. I can't imagine not having time to fully take care of my husband. And I know he loves taking care of me. He loves being the almighty provider. He loves bringing home the money. He loves providing for me. And why shouldn't he? That is what he is ingrained to do. Men are providers and women are gatherers. That is what we are wired for.

I'm all for women holding upper level positions, don't get me wrong. If you love working and want to have a career, more power to you. We have earned that right after years of oppression. Women fought for our right to vote, women fought for our right to earn the same as a man, but that doesn't mean you have to! It just means, you can if you want.

So by all means, be the CEO of a major corporation, but stay at home if you really want to. Be a wife, if you really want to.

I will never understand it. Just because we can do something doesn't mean it's right for everyone. Men and women are not created equal... We are better at somethings than men are , and vice versa. We are not that same. Our brains are totally different. How we process things is totally different. Our emotions are totally different. But that doesn't mean women are second class. And I for one am glad that we are seen as equal counter parts to men. But my dream is to be a housewife in the '50's. I want that life and I'm tired of people looking down on me for that. I'm tired of people saying I'm JUST a housewife. In my opinion, that's a pretty important job. Taking care of a marriage and an husband is a pretty major thing. Maybe our divorce rate wouldn't be so high if people put more importance on stuff like that, I don't know.

I'm just saying, rather ineloquently, that there is nothing wrong with wanting a man to take care of you, or with you wanting to take care of your man.

4 Comments:

Blogger the girl said...

Oops, my bad editing. This paragraph is actually supposed to read like so (edits in bold):


It's also important to realise, however, that feminism (at least in its modern incarnation) is actually about a woman's right to choose her own path. Whether that path involves a high-level career and no partner or children, or a dedicated relationship for a woman who wants to spend all her days caring for her partner and family, is not actually that important. What matters is the right to choose.

Sorry!

xo

June 6, 2009 at 1:05 AM  
Blogger the girl said...

Crud. I wrote a MASSIVE post before the reply above. It's an edit of one part of the original post. I think a gremlin ate the first one. Crud, crud, crud! Will attempt to paraphrase what I originally tried to say:

* * * * *

Erin! Great post.

I'm familiar with the original blog to which you're referring, and I'm so sorry that it was upsetting for you

My understanding of it was that, essentially, the author was frustrated by her friend's lack of integrity. I read the post to mean that she was angry about the fact that her friend seemed to be giving up on her life ambitions to apparently pursue financial independence the so-called 'easy' way: by marrying a rich man. She seemed to be annoyed that her friend was 'selling out' her dreams for a potential sham (yet financially lucrative) marriage. Perhaps those feelings were expressed in a raw and (unintentionally) insensitive way for you. I guess a blog is a place where people can go to vent their feelings and work through their issues in a constructive way. Not trying to justify what was said, though. Just offering my 2c.

However, I can completely understand where you're coming from on this one, especially in view of your husband's dangerous career. It's perfectly natural to choose to dedicate your life to caring for a man who's risking his own life to do what he believes will better the world. Nobody has the right to belittle or de-value that choice.

*Insert paragraph from above*

And for people to respect that choice.

And it seems as though this might be the issue with that particular post: a (perhaps unintentional) lack of respect for your independent and valid choice.

I, for one, applaud your eloquence on this issue, and wish you every happiness in your life path.

Lots of love

xo

June 6, 2009 at 1:29 AM  
Blogger Lindsay said...

I love staying home with my daughter taking care of her and the hubby. Its what I was meant to do! Im glad I had the option, I would never have made it as a career woman. :)

June 6, 2009 at 9:31 AM  
Blogger d.a.r. said...

Somehow, somewhere along the way, feminists forgot what feminism was about--the right to have the CHOICE to have a kick ass career or stay at home and be totally fulfilled by taking care of kids. the house, and her husband. I think they spent too much time fighting for what men have that they forgot that some (a lot? most?) women actually love doing what they have ALWAYS been doing!

More power to you :) I don't have the patience to stay at home with kids. I wish I did, but I don't. So I plan on being the best mom I can--working my butt of and being a great example of someone they can become IF they want to :) But, I definitely do not look down on women who stay at home! My mom did for the first 15 years of my life and I loved it!

June 7, 2009 at 1:56 PM  

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