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A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle: My husband

A Boy, A Girl, and The Marine Corps: A Love Triangle

"I cast my lot with a Marine and where he was, was home to me." ~ Anonymous.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

My husband

I hear from my husband a lot right now. He instant messages me at night (my night, his morning) and sometimes again in the morning (my morning, his night).

They are in limbo right now. Not to the final destination, but not doing anything either. He eats chow... a lot. LOL.

It's actually kinda hard. I'm hearing from him all the time, so there is no adjusting to him being gone. I find myself impatient when I don't hear from him when I want to. Today, I needed to ask him something and got the urge to text him to tell him to get on the computer. Totally ridiculous, I know. But there is too much communication going on.

We run out of things to talk about to tell you the truth. Besides, it won't be like this for his whole deployment. I supposed I should soak it up while I can. When he moves on, who knows how often I will hear from him. It's just hard to set up my independent life if he is calling all the time. I should be grateful that he can call and message me all the time. There are wives out there that go months without hearing from their husbands, but it's so hard.

I need to let go of it. I can't communicate when ever I want to. I can't always talk to him about my day. I need to be able to let that go. But part of me wants to talk to him. I want to hear from him and know he is ok. I want support from him. I need to get over that. I need to learn to be without my husband. I need to be ok with not talking to him, but as long as he is calling, that won't happen. And frankly, I'm not ready to tell him to not call. I want him to call as often as possible because I'm just not ready to let go.

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